Being a Stay At Home Mom

Thank's to some ladies on Facebook, they gave me this awesome topic to talk about! I remember the moment that Chad said I would be able to be a SAHM, it was actually over a text message! He had taken another job at work, got a pay raise, and said I would be able to stay home. I have always wanted to stay home with my children for many reasons. I love the fact that I will be able to see all of her firsts and be there when she needs me. My mom wasn't able to stay home with us growing up, but she did take one day off during the working week. I remember every Wednesday how excited I was because I was able to be home with my mom and she was just as excited to be home with us. When we first brought Ella home I was very blessed to be able to have Chad take two weeks off work to be home with me. Ella was born via c-section and I was in so much pain, luckily he was there to help me out. I had always thought that being a SAHM would be rainbows, unicorns, and butterflies, boy was I wrong! The first week she was home was by far the hardest week of my life. I wasn't used to being up every couple of hours, trying to heal from surgery, changing diapers, trying to breast feed, and changing her cloths constantly. It was like this never ending cycle I really thought would never end. Once Chad went back to work it was really a struggle for me mentally, physically, and emotionally. I felt so guilty because I had want to be a mom as long as I can remember and then I was so stressed out by having a child. A couple weeks later it did start to get easier though. I had seen blogs from Pinterest that showed these moms being "Super Moms." They would have their hair done, freshly painted nail, Starbucks, dressed cute, and most importantly being the best mom they could be. Now THAT is what I wanted to be. I wanted to come off like I had it all together, when I actually didn't. I am really the best mom I can be. I am lucky if I get out of my sweatpants, put on a bra, or actually get a shower in when Chad is at work. I am lucky if I get the dishes clean or get the house vacuumed. But I would take looking this way over being something I am not. I remember the first time she laughed and the first time she smiled, not every mom can experience that. Ella and I have a blast at home she doesn't know I am in sweats and need to brush my teeth. No one is harder on me than myself, I have always wanted to be a perfect mom. Once we got home, I realized I am not a perfect mom nor am I ever going to be the perfect mom. Now that Ella is 5 months old it has gotten a lot better. We are working on a schedule, which is going great, playing more and doing activities, and watching Mickey Mouse of course. A lot of the time things don't happen like you want them to or even plan them too but who cares! Being at home with Ella is the most stressful yet rewarding job I could ever do. I don't get a check every week but I do get a beautiful child who gives me the biggest smile every morning when I get her out of bed. I am so incredibly lucky and blessed to be able to stay at home with her, I love every minute of it.